It’s a real shock for young parents when their first child becomes a toddler. They wonder how their sweet baby turned into such a whirlwind of activity, and such a bossy creature. In fact, when a baby becomes a toddler, it’s not uncommon for a new mom to comment, “I’ve lost my baby!” To get through this stage, parents need to be aware of two facts about toddlers – one about their general nature and another about temperamental differences among children.When parents understand these two basic facts, they’re less likely to feel there’s something “wrong” with their toddler or their parenting.
The Nature of Toddlers
Toddlers are cute and fun, but they’re also exhausting. At the toddler stage, children don’t concentrate. They’re very distractible. They don’t sit still very often, and they can be loud. They’re not reasonable, so trying to persuade them of anything often meets with limited success.
With all their demands, mischief, energy and temper tantrums, you always know when a toddler is in the house. And, of course, stubbornness dominates during the toddler stage. “No!” is the toddler’s favorite word; “I don’t want to,” a favorite phrase.Toddlers and TemperamentAlthough we can describe how toddlers behave in general, parents need to understand that different toddlers have different temperaments. There are basically four different temperaments, which Kenneth Condrell listed below:
1. The slow-to-adapt toddler: A toddler with this temperament craves routine and the status quo. These children find change disturbing, so parents are wise to give advance notice when a change is about to occur. “As soon as the timer goes off it will be time for your bath,” you might tell this child. Here are a couple of other suggestions for ways to talk to the slow-to-adapt toddler:“You can go on the swing one more time.”“After dinner we will visit Grandma.”
2. The very active toddler: These children makes the average toddler look he’s moving in slow motion. They find it hard to sit still. They resist confinement and lose control easily.Parents can manage a very active toddler in a number of ways, including scheduling a lot of outdoor play to burn off energy, and avoiding outings where he’s required to sit for extended periods, such as at restaurants, church and movie theaters. Finally, it’s important to gently remind this child when he starts to get out of control: “You’re getting too wild. Calm down.”
3. The high-intensity toddler: You can’t miss the high intensity toddler. He’s loud and extroverted. One way parents can manage his is by gradually teaching him the difference between an indoor voice and an outdoor voice, and reminding him to use his indoor voice when he becomes loud.
4. The sensitive toddler: Many toddlers are finicky, but the sensitive toddler seems finicky about everything. Some common complaints from the sensitive toddler are that his clothes are too itchy, his coats are too warm, his shoes are too tight, the ice cream is too soft and the super market is too noisy.
Parents can manage the sensitive toddler by:
Being patient. Remember that the irritations the sensitive child complains about aren’t imagined or overstated.Accommodating the child within reason. Buy clothes that are not scratchy, for example. Cut out clothing labels that might bother him and invest in shoes that close with Velcro instead of shoelaces .
Although toddlers can really challenge new parents, when you understand your child’s temperament, you can better anticipate problems and react in a calm, cool manner.Then, before you know it, your child will be a preschooler!How time flies,moms!!
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